Yesterday, S and I went out. He was supposed to pick me up at my place around 7pm but I was running really late so I told him I would drive and meet him at his place. I finally left my place at 9pm. I found out he only lived 15 minutes away so the drive was not bad at all.
He has a nice apartment (definitely a bachelor's pad). Hanging on the wall was a picture of a cute little girl and on his laptop was the same picture-so obviously my antennas went up. He was very honest and let me know that was his 6 year old daughter and she lives back home. As he talked about her it was evident that he loved and cared for her very much (how sweet). However, it also threw me for a loop-a major discussion point with myself. But these days I am trying to be open-minded and to give people a chance.
He is such a gentleman (which I definitely love) he came to my side of the car and opened my door for me. We went out to a local restaurant in DC that had a live band playing. The evening was really relaxed and we got to talk and get to know each other better. I found out he is really focused, has a plan for his life, is not into playing games and lets his intentions be known.
In a nut shell at the end of the night he told me that he was willing to take his time to build up to a relationship however, he wanted me to know that his intentions were a relationship in the long run. He said he was not into investing emotions, time etc and it leading to nothing (especially if I know before hand that I am not on the same wavelength he is on). I told him that I appreciated his honesty but I didn't time to think about all that was said. So I have this week to think and pray about everything then get back to him.
Now its decision time for me. He represents a lot of things I want in a guy: God fearing, caring, thoughtful, kind and generous. To illustrate some of these: yesterday when I told him I needed time to think and pray; he actually gave me some scriptures to read and he explained them to me- and No the scriputurs were not biased to his view point-which is what I thought at first. This afternoon, he stopped over just to leave me roses, chocolate and a card. He sings to me on the phone, he cooks and is willing to do my laundry etc. I know its just the beginning and ppl make a lot of promises they can't live upto but this guy makes promises I have never heard any other guy make. Additionally, he pointed out that the way we met was not orchestrated by any of us instead I was brought to him. This is how Eve met Adam, it was not because of Adam's own desires; God saw that he was missing a companion, made Eve and brought her to Adam. Ruth the Moabitess was also brought to Boaz. This I thought was very profound and stood out to me. However, I also know that the devil tempted Jesus in the dessert with scripture. Furthermore, my Pastor always tells me not to compromise on the big issues ( a child and life aspirations are major issues). So this week, I will not be anxious for anything instead I will turn to Jesus Christ and ask for guidance. I know that at the end of the week, I will have a decision and it will be the right decision.
In the Mighty name of Jesus, Amen and thank you.
Faith
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Allowing Yourself to Date Again
Good evening,
This weekend was Memorial weekend and I really enjoyed myself. Thank you God for your continued mercies and opportunities. On Friday I just woke up and talked with God. Our conversation revolved around the usual-dating. I came to the realization that even though I am complaining that no guys approach me these days; I had to face the fact that I just do not make myself available. I finally understood that these are my days to date and get to know how different guys treat girls. However, the key is to still remain abstinate. I truly said that I would be open to opportunities that presented themselves.
Little did I know that God was already working out a plan. (I don't know why I don't just stand on God's word and believe-instead I constantly doubt His word thinking that they are my own thoughts). I took my car into the dealership for a routine oil change and 2 hours later I was having lunch with a really nice guy.....
I pulled into the dealership and the attendant noticed the flag on my dashboard and started small talk about my country. Afterwards, while I waited for my car he introduced me to his co-worker from Ghana and we continued talking. His Ghanaian friend said he had a lot of friends from my country. We talked for about an hour and during that conversation the Ghanian guy suddenly passed his phone to me saying that I should say hi to his friend from my country. I spoke to the guy and we exchanged pleasantries. He asked how much longer I would be at the dealership and I told him about another hour since the mechanic found other things I needed changed on my car. To my surprise he said he would pass through the dealership to say hi.
Now for all those that know me -know that I was panicking and already "overthinking" the whole situation. However, this time I said I would just see how things played themselves out. Low and behold about 20 minutes later, I met him. I'll call him "S". Being honest my first thoughts were wow he's shorter than me and not that attractive but I still decided to give the guy the benefit of the doubt; thinking the usual will happen- we will talk for a little bit, exchange numbers and I probably won't call him-but I will make an acquaintance.
"S" probably knew my thoughts because he then said he would like to take me to lunch right then and there. Smart move I thought and I was hungry so what the heck. We waited for a few more minutes for my car then I followed behind him to go to a nearby restaurant. We had a nice lunch-it was so spontaneous and so unlike me. "S" was really nice, thoughtful and caring. It was nice to meet a serious guy through his introductions was basically telling me what he wants next in life- a wife. Afterwards, we said the usual good byes.
In the afternoon, he called me three times and left two text messages??? Is he a stalker or just very caring? I also had to ask myself these questions: Am I ready to be in a committed relationship? Am I ready to get married or do I just like to talk about it? Do my actions contradict my speech pattern? Do I purposefully go after guys that I know are not ready to commit just to validate my opinions and thoughts? Here is a guy that seems straightforward I am ready to run for the hills??????
A little digration; that evening I was invited to go to a friend's birthday part at a lounge in downtown. The prior Sunday I had asked B to come with me but during the week he said he would be out of town. I then asked one of my other friends to go with me. The night of the party she called me and said something came up. At that point it was too late to call anyone else so I had to go alone-things always work out for the good.
I met my friend and all her other friends- we had a lot of fun. I danced in heels till the "wee" hours of the morning- I am not wearing anymore heels for the remainder of the weekend-thats how bad it was (LOL). There were a couple of interesting guys there. One does IT in the VA area and the other was just a guy that had a British accent (it gets me all the time). In addition, to these two, my ex-boyfriend was also was also there-boy was I glad I was looking good. I just waved and said a quick "hi". When I got home that morning, my ex called me-it was as if we had spoken the day before-not a year ago. We'll c...............................................
As you can see I had an eventful weekend. Now I just pray that God continues to allow me to be open to opportunities that come my way, grant me wisdom and discernment, help me determine exactly what I want in a spouse, go with the flow and just enjoy life; I only have one life on this earth and I want it to be a life without regret.
Amen and here is to the remainder of 2009 :)
This weekend was Memorial weekend and I really enjoyed myself. Thank you God for your continued mercies and opportunities. On Friday I just woke up and talked with God. Our conversation revolved around the usual-dating. I came to the realization that even though I am complaining that no guys approach me these days; I had to face the fact that I just do not make myself available. I finally understood that these are my days to date and get to know how different guys treat girls. However, the key is to still remain abstinate. I truly said that I would be open to opportunities that presented themselves.
Little did I know that God was already working out a plan. (I don't know why I don't just stand on God's word and believe-instead I constantly doubt His word thinking that they are my own thoughts). I took my car into the dealership for a routine oil change and 2 hours later I was having lunch with a really nice guy.....
I pulled into the dealership and the attendant noticed the flag on my dashboard and started small talk about my country. Afterwards, while I waited for my car he introduced me to his co-worker from Ghana and we continued talking. His Ghanaian friend said he had a lot of friends from my country. We talked for about an hour and during that conversation the Ghanian guy suddenly passed his phone to me saying that I should say hi to his friend from my country. I spoke to the guy and we exchanged pleasantries. He asked how much longer I would be at the dealership and I told him about another hour since the mechanic found other things I needed changed on my car. To my surprise he said he would pass through the dealership to say hi.
Now for all those that know me -know that I was panicking and already "overthinking" the whole situation. However, this time I said I would just see how things played themselves out. Low and behold about 20 minutes later, I met him. I'll call him "S". Being honest my first thoughts were wow he's shorter than me and not that attractive but I still decided to give the guy the benefit of the doubt; thinking the usual will happen- we will talk for a little bit, exchange numbers and I probably won't call him-but I will make an acquaintance.
"S" probably knew my thoughts because he then said he would like to take me to lunch right then and there. Smart move I thought and I was hungry so what the heck. We waited for a few more minutes for my car then I followed behind him to go to a nearby restaurant. We had a nice lunch-it was so spontaneous and so unlike me. "S" was really nice, thoughtful and caring. It was nice to meet a serious guy through his introductions was basically telling me what he wants next in life- a wife. Afterwards, we said the usual good byes.
In the afternoon, he called me three times and left two text messages??? Is he a stalker or just very caring? I also had to ask myself these questions: Am I ready to be in a committed relationship? Am I ready to get married or do I just like to talk about it? Do my actions contradict my speech pattern? Do I purposefully go after guys that I know are not ready to commit just to validate my opinions and thoughts? Here is a guy that seems straightforward I am ready to run for the hills??????
A little digration; that evening I was invited to go to a friend's birthday part at a lounge in downtown. The prior Sunday I had asked B to come with me but during the week he said he would be out of town. I then asked one of my other friends to go with me. The night of the party she called me and said something came up. At that point it was too late to call anyone else so I had to go alone-things always work out for the good.
I met my friend and all her other friends- we had a lot of fun. I danced in heels till the "wee" hours of the morning- I am not wearing anymore heels for the remainder of the weekend-thats how bad it was (LOL). There were a couple of interesting guys there. One does IT in the VA area and the other was just a guy that had a British accent (it gets me all the time). In addition, to these two, my ex-boyfriend was also was also there-boy was I glad I was looking good. I just waved and said a quick "hi". When I got home that morning, my ex called me-it was as if we had spoken the day before-not a year ago. We'll c...............................................
As you can see I had an eventful weekend. Now I just pray that God continues to allow me to be open to opportunities that come my way, grant me wisdom and discernment, help me determine exactly what I want in a spouse, go with the flow and just enjoy life; I only have one life on this earth and I want it to be a life without regret.
Amen and here is to the remainder of 2009 :)
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Hmmmmmmmm
Day in and day out we are constantly thinking and trying to manipulate things to go our way.
When will we let God have His way?
My child He says let go and know I am here. Be still and know I am God. Why do you feel that you must handle everything on your own? Do you not know that I created you? I know what you can and cannot handle. I ordered all the steps of your life. Everything you are facing and will face I already knew would happen. Just like the birds of the air you need not worry about anything. Acknowledge me first and I will make your paths straight.
My Father I want to acknowledge You in all my ways-I truly do. I want to live by faith and not by sight but Lord it is so hard. Lord help me learn how to have time for you no matter how busy my day is. Lord I know that you have the best in store for me. I also know what I chave prayed for. Please O'Lord open the eyes of my heart so that I can see You in my life. Especially in the relationship aspect of my life. Lord I honestly do not understand what I am going through. If I can see Your plan/ purpose for my life I would be able to fulfill. Please God allow me to hear from You.
You say where there is confusion You will give me wisdom, understanding and knowledge. Lord I bring B to you. I know confusion is not your portion. I tell him I give up on the possibility of us ever being more than friends then he sends me the sweetest email and is the sweetest guy. Lord what am I supposed to do?
Being next to you I feel like the safest person on earth.
On that day, I longed for that moment to never end,
We were in the midst of ppl but all I could see was you, all I wanted to see was you.
I had the best of both worlds-being with you in the presence of God
I have never had such an experience- it was wonderful & I pray that I have
many more.
I ask myself this question a million times, if everything seems great what holds you
back?
My continued prayer is that God shows us the way.
When will we let God have His way?
My child He says let go and know I am here. Be still and know I am God. Why do you feel that you must handle everything on your own? Do you not know that I created you? I know what you can and cannot handle. I ordered all the steps of your life. Everything you are facing and will face I already knew would happen. Just like the birds of the air you need not worry about anything. Acknowledge me first and I will make your paths straight.
My Father I want to acknowledge You in all my ways-I truly do. I want to live by faith and not by sight but Lord it is so hard. Lord help me learn how to have time for you no matter how busy my day is. Lord I know that you have the best in store for me. I also know what I chave prayed for. Please O'Lord open the eyes of my heart so that I can see You in my life. Especially in the relationship aspect of my life. Lord I honestly do not understand what I am going through. If I can see Your plan/ purpose for my life I would be able to fulfill. Please God allow me to hear from You.
You say where there is confusion You will give me wisdom, understanding and knowledge. Lord I bring B to you. I know confusion is not your portion. I tell him I give up on the possibility of us ever being more than friends then he sends me the sweetest email and is the sweetest guy. Lord what am I supposed to do?
A poem (of sorts)
The little things in life
You didn't even have to say a word,
your presence, your touch was enough
when I am near you, I act like a little school girl too nervous to talk
I feel like I can tell you anything but fear holds me back.Being next to you I feel like the safest person on earth.
On that day, I longed for that moment to never end,
We were in the midst of ppl but all I could see was you, all I wanted to see was you.
I had the best of both worlds-being with you in the presence of God
I have never had such an experience- it was wonderful & I pray that I have
many more.
I ask myself this question a million times, if everything seems great what holds you
back?
My continued prayer is that God shows us the way.
Continued..........
....the dinner was a great surprise. All my friends were there both old and new. On my journey of growth, I discovered a few things that night: 1) family is always there for u 2) there are sum friends who r just genuine friends and who always have ur best interest at heart. (I thank God for F because she is the friend I have known the longest in this country. She is like another sister to me. She always has my back no matter what. Thank you God for her. Lord I pray that you may grant her the desires of her heart this year. Please always watch over her & protect her. 3) I learned that M & I will never be. I can finally put that possibility to rest. 4) B is still the one for me-no matter how much I fight it ppl he is the one-I can't explain it but I trust God that He will work everything out. I am really tired about thinking about the whole situation so I just give it up to God and ask that His power works through all. I hope that by the end of this year this situation will be sorted out one way or the other-please God. I really enjoyed sitting across from him the whole evening. I also found out that in as much as you think you know someone you dont. He is really into taking pics-like seriously. Again, his generosity and kindness came out (the bros). 4) This year is great and I love my new friends and look forward to many more years of friendship.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)