My Father, my God,
I thank you for speaking to me today, I really needed to hear your voice.
Thank you for reminding me of Your Power and Your Might.
And that You had me in Your hands and there was nothing I needed to worry about.
Thank You for reminding me that I did not have to be afraid or timid because You
gave me a Spirit of love, power and a sound mind.
Thank You also for reminding me that You have always been there for me no matter what.
As a result, I was finally able to tell B, that I was moving on without him because, I finally had to come to terms with the fact that we were on two different pages. I apologised for all my antics, arguments, assumptions etc.
Surprisingly but thanks to the Grace of God I am fine with this decision. I have told him so I can finally move on. I am putting God first in my life and as the song says..I don't mind waiting. I also find solace in Isaiah 34: 16
Look in the scroll of the Lord and read:
None of these will be missing,
not one will lack her mate.
For it is his mouth that has given the order,
and His Spirit will gather them together.
He allots their portions;
his hand distributes them by measure.
They will possess it forever
and dwell there from generation to generation.
Amen
& Gd nite
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Sunday, March 22, 2009
The Peace of God
Good evening,
I had an awesome weekend; and it was filled with pure, good and simple fun. It did not involve getting drunk or clubbing. This would not have been possible a few years ago. All I can say is Glory be to my Father for ordering my steps and bringing me a mighty long way.
Lord, I thank You for all that You have placed within me and I promise to use it to build your Kingdom. May I always have a humble spirit and acknowledge that You are the author and finisher of my life; without You I am NOTHING.
On Friday I got to hang out with the youth at my church; we had an overnight and it was really fun. We had discussions, watched movies, played games and of course ate the whole night. It was a really fun (I know I said that already) and relaxed night. B was there too so that made it all the better (I know, I Know I am no longer jumping to any conclusions, I'm just going to put everything in God's capable hands-because He is able to do exceedingly abundantly in my life).
Back to the story....so we discussed the issues that were proposed and "boy oh boy" were people opinionated including moi. We then watched a movie. I sat down next to one of my friends and we were just chiling, then B decided to move his chair and sit next to me. "What is this all about?" is what I was saying to myself trying to rationalize his actions-was there no more space anywhere else or did he just want to sit next to me? I don't know.
I don't know if you have noticed but I am trying a new approach-the in God's hands approach. Not reading too much into any situation and just waiting to see how things play out. With this new perspective, I just took the situation for what it was. He was sitting next to me and I enjoyed it regardless of the reason behind it. Afterwards we played a game and everyone got "worked" up-it was hilarious to see some calm people lose it-me included.
Around 5am the next movie was put on but I was so seriously tired. I got my covers, little mattress and pillow and was about to pretend to watch the movie. B and C (oh yeah C was there too but she is cool peoples now-I'm trying to work on that-a story for another time) were sitting on chairs behind me. U know even though I'm trying a new perspective u know I couldn't help the slight "stinge" of jealousy that rose up, but I gave it over to God right then and there. When I was about to fall asleep B (I guess was tired too) got off his chair and moved to the floor right next to me and went to sleep. I couldn't understand this either but I really appreciated the gesture. The next morning B and I were back to our usual antics-polite small talk.
On Saturday I got to hang out with my girls. They cooked, I watched Maid of Honor and afterwards the "Color Purple" while they played the "drinking game." All in all it was a nice and quiet way of spending a Saturday night. At church this morning, B sat next to me before I left for sunday school. God help me not read too much into things. Afterwards, we talked and joked around. I like this, God please help us be friends.
I will end with this:
Lord help me be mature in Christ Jesus so that I may exercise and practice Your word so that my senses and mental faculties will be able to distinguish between what is morally good and noble and what is evil and contrary to Your divine Will. Paraphrase of Hebrews 5:14 (Amplified Bible)
I had an awesome weekend; and it was filled with pure, good and simple fun. It did not involve getting drunk or clubbing. This would not have been possible a few years ago. All I can say is Glory be to my Father for ordering my steps and bringing me a mighty long way.
Lord, I thank You for all that You have placed within me and I promise to use it to build your Kingdom. May I always have a humble spirit and acknowledge that You are the author and finisher of my life; without You I am NOTHING.
On Friday I got to hang out with the youth at my church; we had an overnight and it was really fun. We had discussions, watched movies, played games and of course ate the whole night. It was a really fun (I know I said that already) and relaxed night. B was there too so that made it all the better (I know, I Know I am no longer jumping to any conclusions, I'm just going to put everything in God's capable hands-because He is able to do exceedingly abundantly in my life).
Back to the story....so we discussed the issues that were proposed and "boy oh boy" were people opinionated including moi. We then watched a movie. I sat down next to one of my friends and we were just chiling, then B decided to move his chair and sit next to me. "What is this all about?" is what I was saying to myself trying to rationalize his actions-was there no more space anywhere else or did he just want to sit next to me? I don't know.
I don't know if you have noticed but I am trying a new approach-the in God's hands approach. Not reading too much into any situation and just waiting to see how things play out. With this new perspective, I just took the situation for what it was. He was sitting next to me and I enjoyed it regardless of the reason behind it. Afterwards we played a game and everyone got "worked" up-it was hilarious to see some calm people lose it-me included.
Around 5am the next movie was put on but I was so seriously tired. I got my covers, little mattress and pillow and was about to pretend to watch the movie. B and C (oh yeah C was there too but she is cool peoples now-I'm trying to work on that-a story for another time) were sitting on chairs behind me. U know even though I'm trying a new perspective u know I couldn't help the slight "stinge" of jealousy that rose up, but I gave it over to God right then and there. When I was about to fall asleep B (I guess was tired too) got off his chair and moved to the floor right next to me and went to sleep. I couldn't understand this either but I really appreciated the gesture. The next morning B and I were back to our usual antics-polite small talk.
On Saturday I got to hang out with my girls. They cooked, I watched Maid of Honor and afterwards the "Color Purple" while they played the "drinking game." All in all it was a nice and quiet way of spending a Saturday night. At church this morning, B sat next to me before I left for sunday school. God help me not read too much into things. Afterwards, we talked and joked around. I like this, God please help us be friends.
I will end with this:
Lord help me be mature in Christ Jesus so that I may exercise and practice Your word so that my senses and mental faculties will be able to distinguish between what is morally good and noble and what is evil and contrary to Your divine Will. Paraphrase of Hebrews 5:14 (Amplified Bible)
Friday, March 13, 2009
I am Fine the Way I am
Good morning,
Today I was off. I love having Fridays off. I ran some errands then went to do my hair. On one of my errands I went to the Christian bookstore and bought a book entitled "Single for a Season Married for a Reason". Although I just started reading it, I think it is a good book. On my way back from the salon I started feeling down...the usual that I didn't have a boyfriend-someone I could talk to.
Lucky for me I had to meet up with a friend to study for a work exam so I didn't really have time to feel sorry for myself. I went over to my friends house and met up with other co-workers there. As you can guess we didn't get much studying done, in fact I didn't even open my book instead we cooked dinner and just chilled. It was nice just hanging out with the girls and forgetting about "B". That is when I realized that I should enjoy this phase of my life...I can go home decorate my room & house anyway I want, I can do anything on my time. I realized that somewhere in the last couple of years I had lost myself. I am very busy however, the things I am busy with involve B in one way or another so my thoughts are always on him.
*Realization, I need to find other activities that do not involve B otherwise I will always focus on him. Thank You God for this realization. I am wonderfully and fearfully made and I am going to enjoy this phase of my life instead of wishing for something else when I might get it and realize that it is more than I bargained for.
So I came home after dinner and had a nice relaxing evening. I was alone at home and just straightened everything out. I have not had the opportunity to do this in a while. I went out bought a vaccum and new trash can. Can u imagine that is how I spent my Friday evening, but it actually brought me joy. I came home vaccumed the living room, cleaned the dining room and kitchen. I now feel much better, I can't think when stuff is disorganized. Afterwards, I baked two cakes that people ordered. I am now waiting for them to come out of the oven but I now realize I am exhausted. 30 more minutes and I will be in my bed.
Thank You O'God for all You do for me
Please help me serve You first and wholeheartedly
Please grant my brother travelling mercies as he flies back tomorrow
Through God all things work for good
Gnite
Faith
Today I was off. I love having Fridays off. I ran some errands then went to do my hair. On one of my errands I went to the Christian bookstore and bought a book entitled "Single for a Season Married for a Reason". Although I just started reading it, I think it is a good book. On my way back from the salon I started feeling down...the usual that I didn't have a boyfriend-someone I could talk to.
Lucky for me I had to meet up with a friend to study for a work exam so I didn't really have time to feel sorry for myself. I went over to my friends house and met up with other co-workers there. As you can guess we didn't get much studying done, in fact I didn't even open my book instead we cooked dinner and just chilled. It was nice just hanging out with the girls and forgetting about "B". That is when I realized that I should enjoy this phase of my life...I can go home decorate my room & house anyway I want, I can do anything on my time. I realized that somewhere in the last couple of years I had lost myself. I am very busy however, the things I am busy with involve B in one way or another so my thoughts are always on him.
*Realization, I need to find other activities that do not involve B otherwise I will always focus on him. Thank You God for this realization. I am wonderfully and fearfully made and I am going to enjoy this phase of my life instead of wishing for something else when I might get it and realize that it is more than I bargained for.
So I came home after dinner and had a nice relaxing evening. I was alone at home and just straightened everything out. I have not had the opportunity to do this in a while. I went out bought a vaccum and new trash can. Can u imagine that is how I spent my Friday evening, but it actually brought me joy. I came home vaccumed the living room, cleaned the dining room and kitchen. I now feel much better, I can't think when stuff is disorganized. Afterwards, I baked two cakes that people ordered. I am now waiting for them to come out of the oven but I now realize I am exhausted. 30 more minutes and I will be in my bed.
Thank You O'God for all You do for me
Please help me serve You first and wholeheartedly
Please grant my brother travelling mercies as he flies back tomorrow
Through God all things work for good
Gnite
Faith
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